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Give neither counsel nor salt till you are asked for it.
One should provide advice or other material help only when requested.
人不求,我不给。
When I lent I had a friend; when I asked he was unkind.
借钱给人是朋友,讨帐要钱成仇人。
When I lent, I was a friend; and when I asked, I was unkind.
You are welcome as a lender, but disliked if you want back what you have lent.
东西借与人,人当我为友;索回借出物,人与我结仇。
Never answer a question until it is asked.
Don't do anything if not requested by others.
别人不开口,不要凑前答。
Don't say 'No' till you are asked.
It is not clever to reject others before they have asked you for a favour.
要拒绝,也要等到人家把要求提出来了再拒绝。